Potty Training - just the beginning.

Potty Training is something I have been dreading.  It is something that has given me anxiety.  But with the confidence from Max's teacher last week we started the process.  And it is a process. We started January 29th and here is our 9 day story.  

Max doesn't really feel when he has to go to the bathroom, so we have to help him.  The first day was baptism by fire.  He went to school in diapers, and as soon as he arrived his Thomas the Train Underwear were on.  He had no successes that first day.  None.  He cried when he had to be placed on the potty and came home from school very upset. 
I had 5 pairs of pants to wash and lots of dirty underwear. 

At school Max is asked every 5 minutes if he has to use the toilet.  Then every 30 minutes they put him on the potty.  I can tell you the first few days were very rough.  Max hated being at school.  It was hard.  He would cry a lot.  But then, last week I got a text from his teacher that simple said "WE HAVE A SUCCESS!"  He went.  The happy dance was done by everyone in his classroom and he was happy at school.  And then he didn't go again for a few days.  He was getting really stressed out.  Over the weekend he cried and was having so many tantrums.  So on Sunday I said "Diapers!  Just put one on!"  And that is what we did.  And Max slept, and all was right again with the world. 

But then we started again on Tuesday this past week.  He does much better at school.  He has improved over the week.  He started with 4-5 accidents a day, and today he came home with only one pair of dirty pants.  At home it is harder.  He hasn't gone for us yet.  But we still try to follow the same routine at home.  At night he wears pull-ups with underwear over them.  And if we go out we do the same.  He LOVES his underwear, so we put them right over the diaper. 

Rewards:  Because Max doesn't eat candy, chocolate, cake, cupcakes, or cookies this hard been harder.  He will lick dum-dums, and at school Gerald is his reward.  If he has a success he gets five minutes of Gerald time.  He is allowed to play with trains while he sits on the potty, and we are overly excited when he has a success.   At home we let him sit on the potty with the ipad.  He doesn't really understand stickers or a chart, and because of his sensory issues we don't feel like it is fair for him to have to clean up his own mess.  Maybe when he is older? We have had so many good suggestions given to us, and we appreciate them.  We are not trying to rush him, or give him more anxiety, we want him to be successful. 

But until then, Max sure looks adorable in his little boy undies!

And yes, that is the potty in our living room.  We will try anything.  Anything. 

9 Days in...February 6th...
Say some potty prayers for Max. 

Schedule vs. Routine

Max has a definite routine.  He has a way he wants things done and has a very hard time deviating from the routine. 

• Max always has to have Gerald and his two blankets to drink anything.  He holds onto them when drinking from his sippy cup.  He will look all over the house before he calms down to drink anything. 
• He eats popcorn out of a specific bowl in the kitchen.
• He likes to fall asleep on the floor and then we carry him to bed.
• He needs Will to be with him when he falls asleep.  Even if he is just in the room he is okay but Will must be visible.
• He puts himself down for a nap, not at the same time, but the same way.  He must have his blankets and Gerald and a cup of chocolate milk.  
• The way he plays with his cars is a routine.  He lines them up a specific way, and remembers where certain cars go.  If you take a car out of the line up, he will find it and put it back in the same place.
• When he does say words it is because he has made it a routine.  For example right now we are working on hello and goodbye.  He routinely says hello and goodbye to people, animals, and even things (like the pool) but he doesn't make great eye contact.  He just knows this is what we do when we leave or when a person walks into the room.  Hearing him say "hi dawg" and "bye bye pool" is pretty cute.
• When Max asks for cheese, he always wants a piece of bread.  He will rarely eat one without the other.  

Our family schedule changes constantly.  He does have a bedtime routine and we do things the same each day, but as long as his "routine" isn't off he does okay.  We are traveling right now to California.  He does well with traveling as long as he has his daily routines.  He doesn't even mind sleeping in a hotel or in a new place.

Routine is very different than a schedule.